Round Table Discussion: Domestic Discipline
Host: Corinne Alexander
The topic of DD is near and dear to my heart. I have been in a DD relationship with my husband for a little over five years. It is something that I had to build up the courage to ask my husband for and took 9 years of marriage before I took the plunge. I haven’t always been, but I am now glad I waited.
When we married we already had three children between us so life was very busy. Even though we were both head over heels in love, because we dove right into what for many occurs when they are 10 years into marriage it took extra time to completely settle in and build that foundation of trust that is needed in DD. We had to weather a few storms before we were mature enough to fully embrace this beautiful dynamic. Once we did it was just that final thread that cinched our already happy marriage into harmonious bliss (It helps that I was finally being true to myself.)
What I have learned over the years is that DD relationships come in all shapes and sizes. It seems no two DD dynamics are alike. Even my own DD marriage has changed and evolved and even de-evolved many times over the years. As with all things in life the best framework for DD is one that understands life’s evolution and will change right along with it.
A simple definition of Domestic Discipline is that DD is a practice between two consenting adults where one partner gives authority to the other partner to a small or large degree depending on the agreement they have. This includes the authority to give rules & guidelines as well as consequences if those rules & guidelines are not followed. Some who practice DD give full authority to the dominant partner; while others have only a few agreed upon rules or goals in which the other has the authority to administer discipline for.
DD can be the foundation of a marriage; it can be an agreement between two friends, or a specific agreement between two people solely for this dynamic. While I have seen many different types of DD relationships most couples that I know personally are married or in long term relationships. This dynamic involves a lot of trust and a lot of communication so knowing your partner intimately first is usually best if you have plans to embark on this type of relationship. The biggest difference in “Domestic” discipline in comparison to other discipline lifestyles is that it takes place and extends to the domestic every day areas of the people who practice its lives.
We are all unique individuals. Our relationships are all unique as well. Your DD dynamic should fit like a glove for you (this will take time to develop.) The two of you are the only two that matter in your relationship, so what works for you, uniquely, is exactly what is best for you. Enjoy your individuality in this lifestyle and never compare yours with anyone else’s because each of us have different needs and no one way is the right way.
I chose DD as my topic to host both because it is a lifestyle I live with my husband and one that a huge degree of diversity to it. I am purposely being open with my introduction to DD in this post because I want to open the door to discuss the vastly different ways this dynamic can look household to household. While I am sure that we do not have representatives of every type of DD lifestyle in the discussion today I do not wish to leave anyone out. If you practice DD or know someone who does (or even if you don’t) please feel free to join in the discussion in the comment area of this post and each participant’s posts. We would love to hear from you! Please remember that this is a community building discussion circle so keep your comments kind and open minded. I personally very excited to read so many people’s different perspectives and experiences!
In one word, WOW. In two, SO AWESOME. But, I guess you guys will want more than that, so here it is. “Old Fashioned Christmas” by Nickie Flynn is the first book in a while that has kept me up to three in the morning, barely aware of the time. I finished it in one day, and was hooked from the very first page. Melissa Mitchell—AKA Moffett—works as a secretary at a Catholic school where the only nun in residence runs a tight ship. Having no family to speak of, when the invitation comes from her friend Terri to spend the holidays with her family, she accepts, though not without trepidation.
On the drive to see them, Terri informs Melissa of something she’s not a proud of—her brother, Joe, spanked her last summer! Her whole family, she adds, is very old-fashioned. Her brothers spank their wives, and yes, her brother still spanks her when he feels it necessary. She shocks Melissa into silence, but it isn’t for the reason Terri imagines. Melissa can hardly form words after she hears the word spanking. As long as she can remember, she’s had the desire to be spanked.
It isn’t very long before she meets Joe and Melissa and they hit it off right away. Very soon after, she is witnessing her first spanking as Joe whips his sister with the razor strap. As soon as Terri leaves, Joe lets Melissa know that he knows she’s there, hiding in the shadows and watching.
I’m going to leave the rest to your imagination, although I suggest you go buy this book to find out what happens next! You will not be disappointed. This book is so deliciously sexy that you will find your own breath hitching as you flip through the pages. Not to mention the spankings! They are hot and erotic and will leave you—like Melissa—asking for more.
Melisa also hides a secret that gives this book an edge of thrilling suspense. Trust me, this is one you don’t want to miss! If there is one negative thing I could say, it’s that it ends too soon! Luckily for all of us, Book 2 will be coming out next year, and I have to say, February cannot get here fast enough!
by Renee Rose
I found EXPLORATIONS: The First Notebook of Emily Orn Wilkes, Secret Countess of Wessulk by Emily Tilton to be not only the hottest thing I have read in a long time, but also brilliantly executed. Like all of Ms. Tilton’s books, it is unusual. She does not spoon-feed you a formulaic romance with a Hollywood ending, but I assure you, it is worth diverging off the path to dip into anything Emily explores.
In this story, Miss Orn has agreed to marry Mr. Edmund Wilkes, a wealthy scion of a merchant family, in order to save her family, who had fallen upon financial ruin. Two days before her wedding day, Mr. Wilkes sends her a note, requesting she visit an establishment where he opened an account. The story follows Miss Orn’s visit to Smith’s, where she is fitted for her wedding undergarments by Mrs. Smith, who only takes the most fashionable and wealthy ladies for her particular “fittings.” As it turns out, the fitting involves Emily’s introduction to “the drama,” as they call it–her training at Mrs. Smith’s hand (and cane, strap and chastiser) to be a sexual submissive for her new husband.
A master of language and cultural nuance, Ms. Tilton elegantly captures the repression of Victorian times, to deliver a smoldering story of shame and trembling desire. I had no idea I could be so turned on by a femdom situation in what Ms. Tilton calls the The Samois Dynamic (from The Story of O) in which a woman is trained by another woman for her submission to a man.
This is a fascinating and scorching story. The language is dense, so it is not a quick read, but it makes it all the juicier as it will turn you on again and again. I, for one, can’t wait to read what happens when Miss Orn finally marries!
SRR: Tell us about your current release
My current release is a collection of 10 of my short stories called Stories for When the Sun Goes Down, and yes, there are two spank happy tales in there. I Promise to Surrender and Stable Manners. All good fun!
SRR: was the first person you told that you were writing spanking fiction? What was his/her reaction?
I haven’t told anyone outside of my writing friends and they all write the same kind of kinks so it certainly wasn’t a shock to them. One day I’ll tell everyone, maybe, but not right now. I’m enjoying writing and not being worried about what people who aren’t into the genre or the lifestyle think about my words and stories. The last thing I’d want is to feel anxious about a new plot or scene because I’m concerned about how so-and-so might react. I guess that’s why pennames evolved, they give an author complete freedom to write what is in their head without being judged.
SRR: If you were asked to make a soundtrack for your novel, what songs would be on it?
I’ve got lots of spanking in lots of novels and novella’s, but for my sound track I’m going to pick Slap Shot which is one of the books in my Hot Ice series http://www.lilyharlem.com/hot-ice.html (they don’t have to be read in order). In this novel the captain of fictional Vipers hockey team, Rick ‘Ramrod’ Lewis is getting a birthday pole dance from Dana, his new love interest, and as it comes to an end he just can’t help revealing his fondness for a good bit of spanking fun. (Saucy excerpt at the end of this post.)
In the book I actually mention the artist that Dana picks to dance to. Rather than a heavy beaty song she goes for the soulful voice of Norah Jones, and when writing I imagined her twirling round the pole to ‘Broken’. I love the strumming and the lazy flow of this song, it matches her drifting movements and the sweep of her dark hair and the graceful way her long limbs wrap around the metal.
I also like the first few lines of ‘Broken’, it sums up both Rick and Dana well, they’ve both had a rocky past and have finally come together.
“He’s got a broken voice and a twisted smile, Guess he’s been that way for quite awhile, Got blood on his shoes and mud on his brim, Did he do it to himself or was it done to him?”
There’s another part of the book were the music would really have to knock up several levels to keep up with the action. Rick has a crazed female fan and things get pretty scary when she tracks down where Dana lives. ‘Going Under’ by Evanescence has the perfect amount of madness, threat and obsession that has Dana running for her life and Rick battling to save her.
At one point in the book my sexy couple see a live Country and Western performance before enjoying some more slapping fun. The spanking is actually in time with the background music (they’ve sneaked away somewhere private while the show is still going on) and I imagine something like Shania Twain’s ‘I’m Gonna Getcha Good!’ Shania even looks like Dana in the video!
SRR: If your book was turned into a movie, who would you choose to play the leading male?
Oh, soundtrack and casting, this is fun! Okay, for Rick it has to be Joe Manganiello, I’ve even had a few readers say they think he’s perfect for the part. He’s big and brooding, has a seriously sexy smile that he reserves for special people, and those hands, oh, my, they give me weak knees! Check out my Pinterest page with details of my Hot Ice heroes.
SRR: What is your favorite spanking implement?
I like big, calloused hands the best when I’m writing a spanking scene, but I have been known to stray to a hairbrush in The Unwholesome Adventures of Harita
https://www.totallybound.com/the-unwholesome-adventures-of-harita?author_id=128 and a paddle with the heroes initials on in Sexy as Hell (which by the way has serious amounts of spanking both the hero and heroine getting very red bottoms) http://www.harlemdae.com. The initials are cool and leave an imprint on Zara’s buttocks which Victor just adores.
Thank you so much for having me visit today, here’s a little snippet from Slap Shot, to whet your appetite…
* * * *
His hands slid down my upstretched shoulders and his fingertips skimmed the outer curves of my breasts. I shivered at his light touch. I was desperate for more. My pussy was dampening at every scent, sound and caress.
His lips touched between my shoulder blades, his small tuft of facial hair a delicious scratch. I arched as his hands dipped into the hollow of my back.
“Rick,” I murmured, impatient for more.
His big palms suddenly cupped my butt cheeks and he began deep, circular movements pushing and feeling all the flesh on my ass. When he moved them on the outer part of the circle the skin in my cleft stretched taut.
“You have a fabulous ass,” he murmured, stooping and kissing the small of my back. “It’s the perfect roundness and softness.” He curled his fingers into the lace at my hips and dragged my thong down my legs.
I lifted each heel in turn so he could remove it. My pussy was so wet I was surprised moisture wasn’t running down my leg.
His fingers ran down my cleft and over my tightly puckered hole. I jerked forward.
“Shh,” he soothed. “It’s all good, Dana.” He continued his exploration and found the entrance to my pussy. I widened my stance. Wanting him to touch me there was more than a longing, it was an absolute necessity. I would die if he didn’t. I needed him in me…now.
I whimpered as he slipped through my damp folds but didn’t push in. “Rick, please.”
His lips were on the top of my thigh, licking and kissing the crease to my butt. His fingers were teasing me, the way I had him. Not pushing in and not touching my clit either.
A long, low moan of frustration rumbled from my chest, but turned to a cry of joy when his thick finger suddenly entered me high. I clenched around him, squeezing and clamping, grabbing the wonderful filling sensation.
“Ah, fuck, you feel so good every time,” he murmured. “Lord, give me strength.”
I hooked my foot around the pole, spreading myself wider, and he treated me to another finger. Greedily I clasped around it, pulling it inside me as I shoved my mound forward, searching for a connection with my clit. I found it, cool metal shoved up against the sensitive bundle of nerves and I ground harder.
Suddenly a sharp sting bloomed across my left buttock and a slap pealed through the air, overriding the music and ringing around the room.
“Ow, what the…?” Startled, I started to turn.
His mouth was at my temple, his chest against my shoulder blades keeping me tight up against the pole. “Shh,” he soothed, palming the burn in my butt. “It’s okay, it’s going to be amazing, just stick with it.”
His body heat left me and another heated slap, my right buttock this time, hit down. As it seared across my skin, he curled his fingers inside me and stroked over my G-spot.
“Ow, ow, ow,” I panted, the sting making a beeline for my pussy, heating it and increasing the want.
“Oh baby, it’s so pretty, you’re going pink already.”
“But, Rick, I…” My hips were writhing, claiming the wonderful pressure he was applying to my sweetest point. Oh, I didn’t need much more, it was so fantastic, his fingers were so damn clever. And the pole, the cool pole was just right against my clit.
“I want to make you red,” he breathed into my ear.
His words washed over me, a blur amongst the cacophony of other sensations.
“I want to make your ass all pretty and red and then fuck you from behind,” he murmured. “So I can watch your glowing skin tremble for me. Tremble while I fuck you. Fuck you really hard.”
I heard those words loud and clear and Oh. My. God. I should have guessed a guy that overdosed on testosterone would have his fair share of kinks.
Lily Harlem Bio
I’m well and truly British having lived in Scotland, England and now Wales. In what feels like a former life I worked as a trauma nurse in London. A move to the countryside forced me to re-think my career and after attending a creative writing course at the local university I now write erotic romance full time.
Most of my stories are set in the modern day. Often they have a sporting twist (Hot Ice /Scored). Menage a trios presses my buttons too - Shared, Escape to the Country, The Glass Knot (to name a few) as does using Britain as a setting for my novels, though I often skip to the USA for a change of scenery.
While my books are basically romances with the bedroom door left well and truly open, I do like to throw in a bit of kink - Cold Night, Hot Bodies is role-play, Confessions of a Naughty Night Nurse features voyeurism,Stockholm Surrender includes bondage, Green-Eyed Monster a well-loved strap-on. Phew, the list goes on…
I went through a dark stage last year and this showed in my work, so if you want something a bit heavier check out That Filthy Book or Anything for Him (both co-written with Natalie Dae) or Dangerous to Know which is pure erotica and explores whore fantasy. I dabble in BDSM (The Unwholesome Adventures of Harita) and have one m/m novel under my belt, High-Sticked. My latest self published release, Breathe You In is a softer romance dealing with love, loss and hope and has several erotic scenes that are super heavy on the emotion. Already it’s romping up the Amazon charts and is sweeping the board with 5* reviews.
In terms of publishers, my first book hit the shelves thanks to Totally Bound, I then went on to also write for Ellora’s Cave, Xcite and Mischief at HarperCollins. I also self-publish, something I enjoy doing very much as I have complete freedom to move a story in the direction I want it to. Scored and The Glass Knot have been great successes for me in terms of self-publishing and I hope to continue doing this in the future as well as working with my established publishers.
When I’m not writing I’m usually on the beach with my dog. I love to walk, I get lots of ideas strolling along, plus it helps stave off writer’s bum! Lovely Mr Harlem walks with me when he can but his work takes him away frequently, this suits us though, it means I’m left to my imagination and the voices in my head can talk as loud as they want!
Feel free to friend me, like me, read or pin with me, here are my links. I’m usually around, chatting and blogging somewhere on the web.
Lily Harlem Links
Facebook author page
Harlem Dae http://www.harlemdae.com
Raw Talent http://rawtalentseries.co.uk
Newsletter Subscription http://www.lilyharlem.com/newsletter-subscription.html
Sorry I’m late this morning, but I have exciting news. This week’s winner (drawn randomly from participants) will receive the Naughty List boxed set with stories by Maren Smith, Patty Devlin, Maddie Taylor, Renee Rose and Dinah McLeod. Just in time for Christmas!
You know the rules—-250 word maximum. This should be something new in response to the prompt and not something from a WIP or published book. You have until a week from today to post your response using the following phrase:
“Ho, ho, ho”
Roxy and Trevor didn’t work out the first time around. He thought she closed herself off after the death of her beloved grandmother, and she felt deserted when he moved for work. There’s a lot of unresolved anger and hurt between them, but there’s something else there, too. When Trevor comes back on the scene to help Roxy with some construction issues, they both feel all the things between them that were left unfinished, the things that were left unsaid.
First, I have to say that I loved this story. It was full of sex, spankings, fun and the zombie apocalypse! Yes, you heard me right. And I have to say, as I’m definitely not a zombie fan when I first realized what was going on I thought, “Uh-oh, should have read the description on this one first!” But no, author Casey McKay writing draws you in from the first sentence and makes her characters seem so alive they practically jump off the page!
I love, love, love Roxy, who, while she loves to be spanked and submits to punishment spankings, is as feisty and fearless, as sassy and independent as any heroine I’ve ever read. She is my new best friend, so there needs to be a sequel!
This book also carries an air of mystery. Is Roxy’s tenant really an innocent (OK, crabby) old woman as she appears? What does Roxy’s grandmother have to do with all this? And why on Earth does Mrs. Grindle think she’s the key to ending the Apocalypse?
Find out the answer to all these questions and more! Casey’s book is chock-full of steamy sexy scenes that will have your panties dropping in no time! And believe me, she describes them vividly enough to give the imagination plenty to ponder. Great job, Casey!
I have a confession to make: I don’t read F/f fiction, as a general rule. Gasp! Yet, Love’s Reprise has made a convert out of me with its well-written prose, feisty, fiery characters and memorable stories. Each of these stories is a love story, but what you’ll get is so much more. They are each chock-full of steamy sex scenes that will fog up your computer scene as well as…you guessed it! Strong, dominant women who like to take charge and spank the ones they love.
If you’re looking for hot scenes and tender romances—and some rekindled flames that burn rather hot—then I suggest you pick up a copy of this book, stat.
“Complicated Gifts” by Anastasia Vitsky is a story that engages you immediately. Once best friends, Leila and Carene have grown into more. While the hot-tempered Carene is used to being spanked by Leila, it now takes on a different, often sexy vibe. Leila is a renowned musician with the Philharmonic recovering from an injury that leaves her out of sorts. Carene tries to help the oft-bratty Leila the only way she knows how. This was a wonderfully entertaining story that, in my humble opinion, ended too soon. I loved that this story, in addition to being sexy also had depth that I didn’t expect in a short story.
If you like a little bit of haunting and suspense to go along with your love story, then “Broken Promises” by Olivia Starke is the story for you! In this story, Bet is killed by her lover, Edith’s husband for the sin of loving his life. Unwilling to find peace even after he’s gotten his revenge, he haunts their house after his death and frightens away any who would try to make a home there. Until Tabby, his and Edith’s great granddaughter…
For me, the hidden gem of this book was “Broken Dreams” by Cassandre Dane. The character, Ginger, a popular rock star, is as fun as her life is heart wrenching. Married to a famous actor, Ginger has always known what she needs—to be dominated. Unfortunately for her, Draeven is anything but the authoritative, loving figure she needs in her life. Instead, he uses harsh words and her own need against her, dominating her with cruelty. With a life such as this, is it any wonder she can’t stop thinking about the one that got away, her ex-girlfriend Sammy?
“Kimmy” by Kate Richards is a deeply touching story about Kimmy whose wife, Kyra, died in a plane crash. She is reluctant to move on, even though everyone tells her she should, and finds love where she least expects it. Expect to get misty eyed from these poignantly written scenes!
Last, but certainly not least, is “Another Dance” by Lucy Felthouse. Eden and Janine have been best friends and inseparable for most of their lives. That all ends when Eden kisses Janine and her friend kisses her back. Horrified by what she’s feeling, Janine runs away and refuses to talk to Eden, even weeks later. For the past ten years she’s avoided her former friend like the plague, but now that her sister is getting married—to Janine’s brother, no less!—she has to face the music. Can they ever be friends again? Or maybe more?
This was a highly entertaining, thoroughly enjoyable book! All the stories were well written and interesting. Give it a read—you’ll be glad you did!